Pitch Perfect Posters 13: The Killing of Satan
Back in the seventies and eighties, film posters offered so much but the movies they advertised delivered so little. Well not any more. Cutting edge technology, digital filmmaking and sheer balls-out chutzpah means we can now bring those films to celluloid life.
Every day (well, every day-ish), we’ll put up a new poster, a logline, casting suggestions and a synopsis of the film. And someone in Hollywood is going to see this and make the films that these amazing posters deserve. Today’s film…The Killing of Satan
Title: The Killing of Satan
Logline: John Wick meets The Exorcist — you already want to see it, don’t you?
Synopsis: Honey Jackdaw (John Hamm, complete with fulsome moustache) is a mild-mannered, married, middle-aged suburbanite. He has a caring wife Taylor (Rachel Weisz), a loyal dog (A dog) and three very dark secrets. Honey is a reformed Satanist and hitman. Worse, he was Satan’s hitman (cool job title alert).
When Satan comes a-knocking asking Honey to do ‘one final job’ – take out Oprah – his former assassin refuses. So Satan kidnaps both Taylor and Honey’s loyal dog Mr Bellend.
Now, Honey, armed only with a spear and a set of satanic skills, must brave the underworld to save the woman (and dog) he loves. And then kill Satan.
Why it should be made:
Hamm needs his own action franchise. Satan hasn’t been the bad guy in an action film for ages. John Wick is coming to an end. Seriously, if you don’t want to see this, you probably need to call an exorcist yourself.
